When you imagine a co-parent, you probably think of another adult—someone who splits the carpool duty, reminds the kids to brush their teeth, and occasionally sneaks them ice cream before dinner. What I didn’t expect was that my co-parent would arrive in the form of a glitter-clad, guitar-strumming, stadium-filling woman named Taylor Swift.
Now, let me be clear: my husband is wonderful and fully present. But in the daily task of raising three tweens—Henley, Sadie, and Jase—I’ve discovered that Taylor Swift has slipped into our home in ways that feel surprisingly parental. She’s teaching my kids kindness, generosity, and grit, all while delivering it in three-minute pop anthems and Instagram-worthy Easter eggs. Honestly? She’s pulling more weight than some of the sitcom moms I grew up watching.
Henley | The Wild Child Meets the Fearless Songwriter
Henley has always been my firecracker—the one who doesn’t take “no” for an answer and insists on turning every room of our house into a stage. She hums “Champagne Problems” while brushing her teeth, organizes (off) Broadway performances, and somehow convinces her siblings to join in her schemes.
Taylor feels like her kindred spirit. When Henley hears “Fearless” or “Shake It Off,” it’s like the universe is telling her: don’t dim your light, don’t apologize for your joy, and for goodness’ sake, keep being your wonderfully weird self. She sees in Taylor a woman who has carved her own path, often against the grain, and it validates her own boldness.
Even more, Taylor’s kindness tempers Henley’s wild streak. My daughter may be dramatic (understatement of the year), but she also sees that being bold and being kind are not opposites. They can live side by side. Henley has started writing notes to her friends—little “you got this” scribbles tucked into lockers. I’d like to take credit, but let’s be honest: she’s channeling her inner Taylor.
Sadie | The Bookworm Finds a Kindred Dreamer
Sadie is my people pleaser, my book-loving, drama-soaked girl. She organizes her bookshelf by color, plans imaginary plays with full costumes, and takes pride in being both the boss and the star of her own productions – to Henley’s dismay.
Taylor is her blueprint. Sadie sees someone who is unapologetically feminine and still fiercely powerful. She watches Taylor stand on stage in sequins and knows that “girly” is not a weakness—it’s a superpower.
Sadie loves Taylor’s generosity too. Whenever we talk about how Taylor gives bonuses to her crew or donates to food banks, Sadie lights up. She’ll turn to me and say, “We should do that too.” Granted, our “donations” look more like Sadie offering up half her Halloween candy to the food pantry box at school, but the seed has been planted.
She’s learning that generosity doesn’t have to be grand. It just has to be heartfelt. And in that way, Taylor has become the quiet whisper in Sadie’s ear reminding her that kindness always counts.
Jase | The Protector Finds Quiet Strength
Now let’s talk about my son, Jase—the quiet one. He’s a worrier, a protector, and the kind of kid who would rather spend an afternoon on the basketball court than on stage. He doesn’t gush about Taylor the way his sisters do, but every once in a while, I catch him humming along. And when he thinks no one’s looking, he knows all the words.
What Jase absorbs from Taylor is grit. He sees an athlete’s mindset mirrored in her career: setbacks are temporary, practice matters, and persistence wins. He hears about her battles to reclaim her music and recognizes the quiet strength it takes to fight for what’s yours without losing your dignity.
In Jase’s world, that translates into showing up for his team, even when he’s nervous. It looks like studying harder when a subject doesn’t come easily. It sounds like quietly telling his sisters, “Leave Mom alone, she’s tired,” when he sees me stretched thin. Taylor has become an invisible coach in his corner—reminding him that strength doesn’t always shout; sometimes it simply stands firm.
The Lessons Taylor Brings to Our Table
So how exactly does Taylor Swift co-parent three tweens in a small-town family like mine? She shows up in the lessons her life teaches:
- Kindness matters. Whether it’s handwritten notes to fans or a smile at the right moment, Taylor reminds my kids that kindness doesn’t cost anything but pays back in spades.
- Generosity is power. She models giving—not just in dollars, but in spirit. My kids see that generosity isn’t weakness; it’s leadership.
- Grit is non-negotiable. From re-recording her albums to standing tall through criticism, Taylor shows that setbacks don’t define you—your response does.
As a parent, I can preach these values until I’m blue in the face, but hearing them from someone they admire? That’s magic.
Parenting in the Swift Era
Parenting tweens is not for the faint of heart. Some days I feel like I’m running a tiny emotional rollercoaster park staffed by hormonal ticket-takers who demand snacks on the hour. Having Taylor as my “co-parent” doesn’t mean life is suddenly smooth. My kids still bicker – constantly. They still roll their eyes. They still leave socks in places socks were never meant to be.
But when they turn up Taylor’s music, I see the lessons sinking in. Henley sings her little heart out, Sadie dances like no one’s watching, and Jase nods along with quiet resolve. And in those moments, I exhale. Because even if I don’t always have the right words, they’ve got Taylor’s voice reminding them to be brave, be kind, and keep going.
Why It Feels Different This Time
When I was a tween, I didn’t have a role model like Taylor. Sure, there were pop stars, but many of them seemed distant, scandal-plagued, or polished to perfection in ways that didn’t feel real. Taylor is different. She’s glamorous, yes, but she’s also grounded. She talks about her mistakes, her heartbreaks, and her resilience.
That matters. It matters that my children see a woman thriving in her own skin, telling her own story, and refusing to let others define her. It matters that they see her building an empire with empathy at its core. It matters that they get to grow up knowing that kindness and grit can, in fact, coexist.
Raising Swifties
I didn’t set out to raise Swifties. But here I am, living with 2 1/4 of them. And I’ll tell you what: I’m grateful. Because Taylor has become more than a soundtrack—she’s a teacher, a coach, and yes, a bit of a co-parent.
Raising kids in this era feels daunting sometimes. The world is loud, complicated, and often discouraging. But Taylor’s voice cuts through the noise, reminding them—and me—that there’s beauty in resilience, power in kindness, and joy in generosity.
So if Taylor wants to keep co-parenting alongside me? I’ll save her a seat at the dinner table. We’ve got 2 1/4 growing Swifties to raise, and I think we’re doing just fine.
Fry, Party of Five 